Blogmas Day 5: Holidays and Mental Health
Disclaimer: I am not a mental health expert. I am just sharing my own personal experiences. If you need help there are plenty of great resources out there. I've used Better Help before too!
I wanted to share something different today about the holidays and mental health.
I have suffered from SAD (seasonal affect disorder) and depression during the holidays. The depression came from past experiences during the holidays. I wanted to share my stories, and you gave some perspective, and advice for the season.
In 2006, my sister was in the hospital through Christmas. I remember Christmas Eve, Dad and I spent the evening with her. I felt the magic of the holidays was a lie, my Christmas wish was not granted. I stopped believing in miracles. I know it sounds silly but when you grow up with holiday movies, and the "Christmas Miracle" happens you want to believe in them-that they actually exist.
Going forward it was really hard to keep the holiday spirit. In 2008, I was unemployed and couldn't afford gifts for anyone. I think I had just enough to get my roommate a gift and that was about it.
I always felt I needed to make the holidays special for everyone in my life but I am nurturer, giver and I always have put others first before myself. With that, when I don't have enough money for gifts, I feel terrible about it. This has happened more than once in my life. In fact last year I couldn't afford gifts just small ones. During Christmas I struggled so much.
As a single person, the holidays can also be hard because usually it's engagement season, etc but the best advice I can give is not to let it bother you so much.
When my sister died in 2013, I also was in an relationship which was not a good combination of grief and being in love with someone. I got into a fight with my now ex right before Christmas and it really hurt our relationship I believe after that. I won't go into the details of what happened but it really but it really effected my outlook on things.
This year, I had seen a meme going around Facebook (which I couldn't find it to share here) that stated: Don't go into debit making everyone happy, etc. I wish I knew that exact wording but you get the idea. This applies to toxic people if you have that issue in your life. My ex was toxic but I was too naive to realize it. Cutting toxic people from your life doesn't make you a bad person, it's for your own well being and mental health. I took the advice to heart. I started my shopping somewhat earlier this year, I even put my decorations up early this year. I am working very hard not over stress myself and enjoy the holidays for what they are.
Tips for getting through the holidays:
*Less screen time. I have been cutting myself off social media at certain time or I don't check it nearly as much anymore.
*Self care. Whatever it is make sure you do it! For me it's a bath, face masks, listening to Podcasts, etc.
*Get plenty of rest!
*Do some good. Find a local charity to support or make a donation to a favorite charity. Pay if forward. Volunteer too.
*It costs 0 to be kind to anyone keep that in mind
*Talk to someone. If you're feeling stressed during the holidays therapist or friends
*It's okay not to be okay. If you're having a hard time, you will get through it!
*It does get better.
*Be kind to yourself
Hope this helps! Remember you're not alone!
Miss Mag Nificent
I wanted to share something different today about the holidays and mental health.
I have suffered from SAD (seasonal affect disorder) and depression during the holidays. The depression came from past experiences during the holidays. I wanted to share my stories, and you gave some perspective, and advice for the season.
In 2006, my sister was in the hospital through Christmas. I remember Christmas Eve, Dad and I spent the evening with her. I felt the magic of the holidays was a lie, my Christmas wish was not granted. I stopped believing in miracles. I know it sounds silly but when you grow up with holiday movies, and the "Christmas Miracle" happens you want to believe in them-that they actually exist.
Going forward it was really hard to keep the holiday spirit. In 2008, I was unemployed and couldn't afford gifts for anyone. I think I had just enough to get my roommate a gift and that was about it.
I always felt I needed to make the holidays special for everyone in my life but I am nurturer, giver and I always have put others first before myself. With that, when I don't have enough money for gifts, I feel terrible about it. This has happened more than once in my life. In fact last year I couldn't afford gifts just small ones. During Christmas I struggled so much.
As a single person, the holidays can also be hard because usually it's engagement season, etc but the best advice I can give is not to let it bother you so much.
When my sister died in 2013, I also was in an relationship which was not a good combination of grief and being in love with someone. I got into a fight with my now ex right before Christmas and it really hurt our relationship I believe after that. I won't go into the details of what happened but it really but it really effected my outlook on things.
This year, I had seen a meme going around Facebook (which I couldn't find it to share here) that stated: Don't go into debit making everyone happy, etc. I wish I knew that exact wording but you get the idea. This applies to toxic people if you have that issue in your life. My ex was toxic but I was too naive to realize it. Cutting toxic people from your life doesn't make you a bad person, it's for your own well being and mental health. I took the advice to heart. I started my shopping somewhat earlier this year, I even put my decorations up early this year. I am working very hard not over stress myself and enjoy the holidays for what they are.
Tips for getting through the holidays:
*Less screen time. I have been cutting myself off social media at certain time or I don't check it nearly as much anymore.
*Self care. Whatever it is make sure you do it! For me it's a bath, face masks, listening to Podcasts, etc.
*Get plenty of rest!
*Do some good. Find a local charity to support or make a donation to a favorite charity. Pay if forward. Volunteer too.
*It costs 0 to be kind to anyone keep that in mind
*Talk to someone. If you're feeling stressed during the holidays therapist or friends
*It's okay not to be okay. If you're having a hard time, you will get through it!
*It does get better.
*Be kind to yourself
Hope this helps! Remember you're not alone!
Miss Mag Nificent
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